Marriage equality in Michigan: Court case could grant gay couples equal rights
Reprinted with permission from the March 20 edition of the White Pine Press, the student-run newspaper at Northwestern Michigan College in Traverse City.
By Nicole Wildman
Editor in Chief, White Pine Press
At the moment these words were put to paper, somewhere around 280,000 people in Michigan were barred from marriage. About 44,000 of these people have created a life together anyway. Some of them share in the task of raising children. We’re talking, of course, about gay people.
At the time this article was printed, Michigan’s same-sex marriage ban, passed by voters in 2004, was still in effect. But will the law change as the ink dries? Earlier this month, U.S. District Court Judge Bernard A. Friedman heard arguments in the case of DeBoer v. Snyder, and in the coming weeks, he’ll announce his ruling on whether the state’s ban is legal under the U.S. Constitution.
With all the talk about laws, rights, and morality, it can be easy to forget that there are real people affected. So here are some people who, right now, are either waiting for a verdict, or rejoicing at the legal recognition of their partnerships, or dealing with the disappointment of yet another setback in the movement toward equal rights.
Jenn and Elon Cameron
Jenn Cameron grew up in Texas; Elon Cameron grew up on her parents’ cherry farm on Old Mission Peninsula. Eventually, they both ended up in Chicago. It was there, at a mutual friend’s surprise party, that Jenn noticed a “spunky little blonde” … and the rest is history. She and Elon have been together ever since—12 years in all.
The couple moved to Traverse City four years ago and have since built a solid life for themselves, with Elon established in her own acupuncture, Chinese herbal medicine and Oriental medicine clinic, and Jenn working at OneUp Web as a Business Intelligence Analyst. Elon also teaches anatomy and physiology to massage therapists and prospective yoga instructors, and even DJs at The Little Fleet on occasion.
They’re happy here, but it’s definitely different from living in Chicago or Austin, where the climate tends to be more diverse and open-minded, and where Jenn and Elon didn’t feel like their sexuality was under scrutiny.
“We lived for a long time in these liberal, urban bubbles … we definitely felt some concern when we were thinking about moving back here,” Jenn admits. And it turns out their apprehension was well-founded.
“It’s been much more of an issue since moving back to TC 4 years ago,” Elon comments. “We get weird looks at Meijer. I’ve had to toughen up, thicken my skin a little bit.”
The Camerons consider themselves married, despite the fact that neither the state nor the federal governments recognize their union. The couple has tried though — “We’ve gotten close twice—we tried to get married in California in 2008, but Proposal 8 passed the night before,” Elon says, adding that they’d definitely like to make their marriage legal if Michigan’s laws change.
So, they had a spiritual service—or as Elon calls it, an “illegal marriage”— in 2009 in Traverse City. Their ceremony, which took place at the InsideOut Gallery, was officiated by author Marilyn Bennett Alexander. Alexander’s book, “We Were Baptized, Too,” urges the church to stop alienating gays and lesbians, and has a forword written by Desmond Tutu. Well over 100 of their friends and family helped them to celebrate their union, providing a profusion of food. Elon wore a gown designed by Creatures of the Wind, while Jenn donned a Brooks Brothers suit.
They just finished building their house, which they own together. According to Elon, “It’s a dream that was over a decade in the making.”
Life is good, but the Camerons have to deal with constant reminders that their relationship doesn’t enjoy the same legal equality that other marriages do.
“We have to go through certain hoops to legally solidify our family unit. It’s not as easy as filing for a [marriage] license,” Jenn says. “There are just all these little added out-of-pocket costs.”
It’s not just a lack of tax breaks—although the tax benefits of marriage are significant. There are also certain protections on property and custody rights that come with marriage, things most straight couples take for granted. For example, a married couple’s joint income and assets are seen as one in the eyes of financial institutions for the purposes of loans or lines of credit. In the event of medical emergencies, a spouse has rights of visitation, decision making, and access to information. For a same-sex couple living without the legal protection of marriage, these rights can be superseded by blood relatives, even if that goes against the wishes of the individual who’s hospitalized. Relatives can even contest a signed will, and often have more power than the partner who’s been left behind.
“I’m really lucky to get health benefits that cover a partner right now,” Jenn says. But it’s more expensive for both of the Camerons to have that health coverage—around $2,000 a year, according to Jenn. Why? Because while the money that pays for Jenn’s insurance comes out of her paycheck before taxes (as is the case for most people who pay for health insurance), the money that covers Elon’s portion comes out after taxes. That means the couple pays taxes on the money that pays for Elon’s insurance, and that adds up to a lot over the months and years.
With Michigan’s same-sex marriage ban in effect (59 percent of voters approved the 2004 constitutional amendment), problems like this would follow the Camerons even if they did get legally married in another state, since the State of Michigan wouldn’t recognize that marriage as valid. However, same-sex couples who are legally married in other states do qualify for the same benefits on a federal level as heterosexual couples, since the U.S. Supreme Court struck down the Defense Of Marriage Act (DOMA) last summer.
In light of the downfall of DOMA, many speculate that Michigan and other states will follow suit and grant equal rights to same-sex couples.
“That would make me very happy,” says Jenn. “I would feel just amazing about living in this beautiful place … to have equal access to the rights that my friends and my family have access to.”
For many couples, this includes the right to parenthood. A lack of equal marriage rights also results in the inability for same-sex couples to share parental rights. They can’t both legally adopt a child, and if one parent is biological, that parent’s partner is also barred from adopting to gain legal parenthood status. But even those who aren’t ready for parenthood would like to know the option is open to them.
“I don’t know what’s in store for our future, but I do know that if we came across a young person that we wanted to bring into our fold, into our family, to adopt them, then I’d like to think that would be protected by the state we live in,” Jenn says.
As for marriage laws in the United States, Elon sums up the opinion of many pro-equality people:
“If we really do have separation of church and state, then it’s a non-issue. It’s a social justice issue, religion really has no place in that.”
Nick Erber and C. Michael LaPierre
Nick Erber and C. Michael LaPierre got married four years ago in Sault St. Marie, Ontario, but they’ve been together for five years. While the couple went north to share their vows, they could have also chosen to take them in Mexico, where they spent their honeymoon, and where same-sex marriage is legal.
Erber, a practicing counselor, is also coordinator for the Thomas Judd Care Center, an HIV/AIDS service organization that provides case management services for those living with HIV/AIDS in the 26-county Northern Michigan area. In addition, he runs a support group for LGBTQ individuals. (The group meets at Unitarian Universalist Church; see below for contact information.) Erber holds his master’s degree in counseling, and is currently pursuing a PhD. LaPierre is the design specialist for Paperworks Industries, a local company that makes greeting cards and stationary from recycled materials. He’s also an NMC graduate, and has returned for more classes this semester.
While Erber and LaPierre are legally married in the eyes of the federal government (they were able to file their federal taxes jointly this year, thanks to their Canadian marriage license), they still look forward to equal rights in Michigan, in part because they’re planning to adopt a child.
“It’ll impact us directly,” says Erber, commenting on what will happen if Michigan’s same-sex marriage ban is lifted. “We’ll go get a marriage license, and when we go through the adoption process, we can adopt as a couple instead of one person adopting and getting the other person named a legal guardian.”
Like many other couples and families, Erber and LaPierre won’t let marriage laws stop them from adopting.
“We’ll just do it the way that we have to,” the couple states, echoing the sentiments of many same-sex couples in the U.S. In fact, bans on gay marriage and adoptions don’t seem to stop people from living as families, but just create obstacles for those families to face. So why do they persevere?
“Children still need to be taken care of,” LaPierre asserts. “Adopting a child isn’t about the label of being a dad, it’s about taking care of a child. It’s not about the parent, it’s about the child.”
But the couple is optimistic about the future of marriage equality.
“I think [the downfall of DOMA] plays a strong role, because you kind of know the temperature of the Supreme Court on this … one of these cases is going to end up in the Supreme Court and kind of … put the kibosh on all of this,” Erber says. He also thinks that however the judge decides in Michigan, it will impact other states where these types of trials aren’t happening.
Whatever the case, the couple hopes to hear a verdict in Michigan soon.
“I think at this point I’m so tired of reading about it and hearing about it that I just want it to be over,” says Erber.
Jim Carruthers, City Commissioner
Jim Carruthers, a member of the Traverse City Commission and Mayor ProTem, is openly gay. He spearheaded the effort to pass a non-discrimination ordinance passed in Traverse City in 2011 to protect citizens from discrimination based on sexual orientation.
While he’s currently single, Carruthers has had long-term relationships in the past, and is a proponent of the institution of marriage.
“Marriage is a totally healthy thing,” he comments. “If you find someone you want to be committed to, you should totally have that right.”
Carruthers believes that people will get married whether it’s legal or not, but points out that the state and federal governments are set up so that marriage gives people tax incentives.
“So,” he questions, “why can’t everyone be treated equally if they want to get married, gay or straight?” He adds, “Homophobia is a learned thing—it’s a taught thing.”
He’s frustrated with Governor Snyder, who he says ran as an independent who claimed he wasn’t going to get involved in social issues like gay marriage and abortion, but who’s doing just that.
But Carruthers thinks the downfall of DOMA is moving politics forward.
“We’re ticking it off, state by state at this point … and it’s working … we’re growing as a culture, we’re waking up as a culture, and we’re figuring out that we’re a country that does treat people equally.”
For more information on the LGBTQ support group, contact Nick Erber at 231-886-0808 or nick.erber@gmail.com.
